Yes: what does a writer write when she’s not writing, especially when she’s writing in the evening to meet a deadline? These things would all be Facebook and Twitter updates, but NO, I am not going to those pages.  Frankly, doing those things at night is just embarrassing to me.  So here are my deep thoughts:

1) Is the New Yorker cutting back on its use of glue to affix the label to the magazine?  I used to get such joy out of label-peeling, but the peel no longer yields a delightfully gummy strip of glue

2) I can’t believe I’m almost done with the pack of Orbit Sweet Mint that Mom gave me.  I didn’t even think I liked Sweet Mint, but it turns out to be nothing like Wintergreen, which is a good thing (I’m not even going to talk about Mojito Mint, which is a crime against nature.)  Orbit gum wrappers are fun to fold into fans, if you can’t get your happies with New Yorker labels. 

3) I’m about to use the word ‘shove’  Have I used that before in my 123 and counting pages?  Nope!  Ben, feel free to shove your way into the crowd.

4) When you look at it a lot, “shove” looks like it should be pronounced to rhyme with “grove.”  (It actually took a while to think of an ‘ove’ word that rhymes with ‘grove’ instead of ‘love.’  Or, you know, ‘shove.’)

5) What would “shove” (rhymes with “grove”) mean?  I think it is the past tense of “shave.”  “I got dressed and shove and then went to work.”

6) Speaking of getting back to work…

7) (I will not contemplate how “work” could rhyme with “dork.”)

8) I’m hungry for real dinner. 

9) (while eating) Toasted tortillas are the best.  I should write that in my post

And on and on until bedtime.